I think we’ve stumbled upon my a prospective best friend for my little dude, and as with every childhood bond of deep friendship, it’s primarily based on proximity. We’ve found another family living in our townhouse complex who have a son who is almost exactly the same age as Max, even born in the same month. This means that they’ll both be going into junior kindergarten at the same time, and they’ll both attend the school right around the corner. Like magic, my anxiety about the new school and the strangeness of it all has almost entirely vanished. He’s going to have a class buddy! Someone familiar who will accompany him as he embarks upon the journey into the mysteries of primary school.
And, to allay any concerns that their nearness to each other is the only commonality between them, please rest assured that they get along like peas and carrots. They are both smart, energetic, outgoing and creative dudes and they rally enjoy each others company. Of course, this means I now have double the amount of 4-year-old negotiating and pleading when I try to split the two of them up, but it’s a small price to pay.
It’s funny, I normally would feel very awkward about dropping in on a relative stranger, and a younger version of myself would have avoided doing that at all costs. But now, I can do it without really flinching, all because I want the relationship between Max and Shane to grow.
The trick to doing things you’re not comfortable with is having the right motivation. Before I found pursuits that I really believed in, it was impossible to challenge my own limitations and barriers. Now that there are a wealth of causes and goals that I’m chasing after, the intermediary steps I have to take to achieve those goals don’t seem insurmountable. As another example, I set up a meeting with a complete stranger, to talk about their involvement in my riding association. And not only did I set up the meeting, I was excited to go. For someone who used to describe himself as socially anxious, this is a surprising development (and a pretty cool one).
Chris Loblaw, Author 