Well that doesn’t seem fair

I’m in the middle of a bout of insomnia, conveniently timed to mess up a good chunk of my weekend plans. To be accurate, it’s kind of a family affair. None of us have slept well in the last few nights, between the after-effects of a growth spurt, actual insomnia, snoring, stress, etc, etc…It would be great if one of us got ahead of the game and could be the cheery, well-rested example to the other two, but instead we’re a bunch of tired and grumpy gusses.

Since I’ve been effectively sidelined by stupefying fatigue, I’ve had a lot of time to think about the possible cause of my light sleeping/ sleeplessness. There has to be a physical component to it, and that part has me stumped. Unless someone mischievously switched our decaf coffee for full octane java, there’s no excess of chemical stimulus that could be causing it. And I haven’t made any sudden changes to my sleep routine.  So, let’s leave the physical part aside and focus on the circus in my head.

For possibly the first time in my life, I have a large list of activities and plans that I want to work on. I’m 2 chapters away from finishing the first edit o an old book I had sitting around. I’m working with one of my fantastic friends to get an interview with me on a major nerd website, which will give my book an amazing amount of exposure. I’m going to deliver some copies of my book to a local book store, so that people I don’t know could conceivably buy a copy. I’ve got a stack of politically-related tasks that I want to get done. And, I’m considering joining my condo board. With all of these things whirring around in my head, I’ve forgotten how to stop thinking about it and relax. I’ve never been this enthused about a bunch of things at the same time.I complained to the wife last week that I was missing a good, regular, brainless activity that would give me time to relax and be dumb with my friends. We used to have games nights, but the interest waned and no one really wanted to commit to getting together.

This leaves me with a lot of intellectually intensive things that are pre-occupying my mind, and no pressure release to get me ready for bed. Hence, my insomnia. It is a strange and terrible situation when you are lying wide awake in your bed at 3AM, writing your nomination speech. It feels like I’m getting the short of the stick, my brain punishing me because I’m starting to realize my potential. The ill effects of sleep deprivation feel a lot like a hangover, but I didn’t earn a hangover. I’ve been good, I’ve been involved, I’ve been physically active, I’ve been a good dad. Give me some slack, brain!